a letter to Oscar Fox

I've held you now for two hours, uninterrupted. Watched light dance across your face, your eyes flicker every now and again. I study your lips, so much like your brothers and trace your ears, like Amos & Ezra's. I cradle your feet & wrap your tiny fingers around my thumb. I take in your hair line and dark eyebrows, wondering if you'll be a towhead like the others, or if you'll stay dark. I breath you in and pray that I'll remember for all eternity how your tiny body feels splayed across my lap, cradled in my arms.

weekly portrait | week 4

from jan. 27

taking stock // 001

making: lists & plans 

eating: all the soup, because, winter 

drinking: bottomless coffee 

reading: all the pretty horses [technically mikey is reading aloud to me]

listening: to iron & wine and adele 
texting: amber & alexa 

watching: the crown [season 2]

bookmarking: birthday ideas for Mikey & Ez 
wanting: [desperately] warmer weather 

looking: forward to the Palmetto 200 & a night in Charleston afterwards 

enjoying: researching and collecting and making  
waiting: on one of my best friend's baby to arrive 

wondering: if said baby is going to be a boy or girl (?)

loving: my new perfume - my "want" from my boy for Christmas 
hating: being in a cooking rut 
hoping: to really get the ball rolling on the plans mikey & i have been working on

marveling: at the baby stage [again] ... it never gets old 

needing: to catch up on journaling 

wearing: my fav sweat pants & new red adidas shirt 

smelling: snow 
noticing: the stack of felt mikey asked me to put away yesterday (oops) 

knowing: that i should go to bed 

laughing: at mike's bed time tales from tonight 

thinking: about the letter i meant to write earlier this week 

daydreaming: about summer travels with my five boys 

wishing: i'd squeezed in a run today 

feeling: excited about secret birthday plans already made for mikey 
celebrating: [finally] having a baby that likes to sleep at night 

weekly portrait | week 3

from jan. 17 

snow day

We had a blast playing in the snow with these boys! We deemed it the perfect snow day. We stayed home this year instead of tromping around town to play with friends and thoroughly enjoyed sledding on a neighbor's hill that just happened to be one yard away. 

Things I want to remember:

homemade donuts for breaky

a pot o' soup for lunch

bottomless coffee 

solly, our snow bunny 

snow-cream with melbug 

s'mores by the "camp" fire in the den before the camp out (where nobody actually slept)

a portrait a week | week 2

from jan. 9

weekend

Most days our house is a Nerf war zone. Walls are constructed with care, bunkers a built with precision. War gear is donned (typically storm trooper masks & mama's old softball helmet) and battle wounds are doled out like candy. 

Sometimes I hide in the quiet of my room rocking or nursing Oscar, smiling & hoping to remember the sweet sound of squeals, feet plodding & battle cries. Other times I play "reporter" and snap pictures of the war. And other times I go about my business, taking the occasional stray bullet or sword swat in the midst of dishes or laundry. Have I said lately that I really like being the only girl in my house?! 

a portrait a week | week 1

from jan. 2 

2018.

twenty eighteen

a fresh year with lots in store

more travel

less things

new ventures 

wishes & dreams 

peace 

month two | oscar fox

month two 

Two whole months of Oscar Fox! Seriously, you are the happiest, easiest baby. You're content to just be around your people - always watching what's going on. You also don't seem to mind being kissed or patted multiple times an hour (mostly by Ez who absolutely adores you). I think you probably like the attention from your brothers and hope that's always the case. 

You've got dark hair and dark blue eyes. Your dark hair is like Solomon's (was) and your eyes are standard Martin boy. There's something different about your looks though - everyone says you look like mama ... and Carson (who looked just like mama when he was a baby). 

You're an amazing sleeper (knocking on wood as I type this) - sleeping about 6 hours before waking to nurse then sleeping again for another 5-6 hours. Ummm, I'm not sure you're our kid (kidding, kidding). You're currently still sleeping in our room, but Ez is anxiously waiting for you to move to your crib (that's yet to be set up) in his room. 

You've already rolled over a handful of times - from tummy to back - I think because you do not prefer to be on your tummy (although you will sleep on your tummy just fine). You grunt and are super loud at night with all of your sweet noises...daddy & I laugh all the time at how loud you are. You're smiling and talking up a storm (I think all the time that I'm doomed if this is a sign of another kid who's going to talk non-stop...somebody send help! hah!) 

Sweet, sweet Ah-ba-ger, you are so loved by so many. Your village is huge, little buddy. So many people love you and are praying for you. Keep growing big and strong like those crazy big brothers of yours! 

[month two | ezra]

[month two | solomon]

[month two | amos]

merry merry | Christmas + family

Another year of all the family, all the time. Something we're so very thankful for. 

This was a year for hand painted gifts (from Mikey), a girls "spa" date to Starbucks & nail painting, cold weather, home cooked meals & concerts in the living room. 

We're looking back now, with full hearts, thankful for a(nother) Christmas season shared with all of our family.